not alone
by cute-nico
Summary: Maura meets Jane when they re eleven years old on a play ground after school. they meet again after five years but things are nt the same, Jane s encounter with Hoyt changed a lot of things . can Maura be friends with Jane or will Jane push her away like everyone else?
1. Chapter 1

She`s setting on her swing again watching the other kids play, she finally gave up on ever trying to participate in any game. It's not that she doesn't want to but every time she would walk up to them they would give her a look before running away. Some of the kids that were new to the playground would play with her for a day or so before getting shouted at by their parents for it. 'Don't play with that girl' she always hears them saying that, but why? Why does everyone hate her so much? She doesn't need an answer because she already knew it. It's because of her name, because she was a Doyle.

She never met her father but she couldn't hate him more. School isn't different from this play ground, she wants to convenes herself that she likes the quit , that she wants to be left alone so she could read more , study more . Deep down she knows that if any of them asks, she would leave her book and join them at any game they choose. Looking at the kids playing is the closest thing she ever got to actually playing, she watches as a new girl start to play with the boys. _that's odd_ she thinks, the boys treat her as one of their own, she`s laughing and making fun of the other boys as she scores over and over for her team. Her dark curls barley reaching her shoulder as they bonus with each move she makes, she jokes around with the boys smacking them on their arms, laughing with her teammates.

Maura watches as the game starts again ,the new girl running with the ball toward the goal, she kicks the ball too high and all eyes land on the ball that found a new home on a nearby house`s ceiling . The playground is full of 'awww'. The kids start shouting at the girl for what she did, you start to feel sorry for her until she shouts back at them saying that she would get it back. For some reason a smile find its way to your lips at the way this girl is shouting, the dark haired girl start running and you guess that she was getting something to help bring down the ball.

All the kids are waiting, after a few minutes they get bored and start throwing small rocks at the ball on the hope of bringing it down. You watch as each take turns and finally give up when the sun started setting and their parents calling them to go home. you`re curious, you know that if a rock was thrown in the right angel with the right speed it could bring the ball down, you finally abandon your swing and walk up to the house picking up one stone and studying the distant between you and the ball .

With a swift throw the ball falls down, landing in your hands. The kids haven't left the play ground yet, you start running to the gate where you finally catch up to them before they leave.

"Here" you say with a happy smile and short breaths from running. You extended your arm offering the ball to one of them, any of them. None of them take it; they just start shooting you with angry glares. One of them let out a snort

"It's not our ball, and even if it was. We wouldn't have taken it after you touched it, Doyle" a smirk plays on their faces as they turn around to walk away and you could hear what their parents are saying

'Sweet heart, how many times did I tell you not to talk to that kid?'

'Honey, I don't want you near her. Understand?'

'it`s not enough what her father did to our town, now his daughter is trying to be friend with our kids? Honestly'

The sun is fading but you don't care, it's not like anyone is going to be home waiting for you to come back. You're still holding the ball tightly in your hands, anger boiling inside you.

"Where is everybody?" you turn around surprised by the deep voice that came from behind. It's the new girl; she was finally back with a long stick in her hand. You froze; you don't know that to do. You`re scared that she`ll leave too. "Ohhh, you got the ball" the girl finally notices the ball in your hands. Her excitement brings a small smile to your face; it's been a long time since any one talked to you without mocking you or shooting you an angry glare. "Thanks, ma would kill me if I lost it" she start walking toward you with a smile

"Your mother would kill you because of a ball?" Maura asked blankly

"Well not kill me kill me, but kill me you know?" Maura shakes her head slowly, what the hell is this girl saying? She didn't make any sense. "Never mind" Jane blurred out before taking the ball. _Oh, that's why she was being nice to me_ Maura thought and start walking up to her swing "aren`t you going home?" the question was innocent

"Yes, why?" Maura was trying to find a secret agenda for this girl, why did she care if Maura went home or not, it is none of her business

"I just thought we could walk together" Jane said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. Maura smiled without answering "so your coming or not?" Jane started walking and Maura walked quickly to catch up with her "I'm Jane by the way"

"Maura" you answer quietly as you both walk never taking your eyes off the ground

"So ... how did you get the ball down?" Jane tried to start a conversation

"Calculating the distant, wind, weight combined with force necessary to knock the ball…" Maura started blurring out nervously, no one ever offered to walk with her before. All the kids knew by the end of the day who she is and never went near her

"You`re weird" Jane said joking, but you froze. This might be the only conversation you`ll have for a very long time and you already made her think your weird "not bad weird, but good weird, you know?" you smile shyly as you feel you`re cheeks going pink, no one ever gave you a complement. You both keep on talking for what feels like for ever. You talk about a lot of things, Jane mostly takes about baseball and start saying things that you can't make out but you nod anyway. Talking to her feels so easy, you want it to stay for ever.

"Jane Clementine Rizzoli! That better be you" a voice shouts from the house, you can feel the warmth in voice

"Yeah ma it's me!" Jane shouts back before turning to you

"Well, that's me. See you tomorrow Maura" she waves you quickly as she runs into her house, you`re home is nowhere near here, but was worth it. Keeping Jane Company was worth it even if it meant going across the city to get back home.

You hate it here; you hate the way you turn on every light in the apartment to find it empty. You know that all kids your age with no parent and no one to take care of them go to foster care but Alex handles all the paper works to keep you here. The only time you see him is the first day of the month, he`ll probably be here soon so you don't lock the doors.

You start going through the mail, it's always the same. a few letters from your father and a few bills, you don't even bother to open the envelope, simply throwing it in the trash every time you see the prison`s address. You want nothing to do with him, he had no right trying to act as a loving father and writing to you on the hope you`ll reply soon. He should have got the message by now and yet he keep sending those letters, the first goes to the trash fallowed by the second and you`re just about to throw the third when you notice the weight. You curiously open the envelope and a small note book falls into your hand, you can't understand a word in it but you assume it's in code. It might be useful to chase the boredom away you think and place it in your pocket.

Alex knocks before coming in to see you setting on the kitchen counter with your knees pulled up to your chest, your hands wrapped around them and your chin resting on your knees . He places an envelope on the counter next to you

"this is this month`s allowance. The bills and the rent have already taken care of and if something happen you know the number" he says quietly before turning to leave

"_Jane Clementine Rizzoli! That better be you" _the voice echoes in your ears, you wish it was your name that was called, that it was your mother waiting for you to come home

"Alex" you call after him and he stops when you jump off the counter "why don't you ever tell me anything about my mom? What was she like? Why don't I have a picture of her or even her name?" your voice is pleading and he sighs

"Maura we talked about this before. There is no use taking about a person that is not here" he talks gently but you`re not convenes "what bring this up? It`s been awhile since you asked about her" you cross your arms and look the other way not wanting to answer as he leans in ,placing a gentle hand on your small shoulder . he stand straight with defeat when he realize that you`re not going to answer " spend it Wisely" he gesture toward the envelope before leaving and shutting the door behind him ,your alone again .


	2. Chapter 2

Maura woke up early as usual, everyday lying in her bed for a few minutes to remind her of how worst it could be. She was running out of ideas each day but today was different; she had Jane to add to her list. With a small smile, Maura finally got out of bed scanning the empty apartment before heading to the bathroom. After a cold shower and getting dressed with a simple shirt and jeans Maura went to the kitchen looking for breakfast. She made a mental note to go shopping; the fridge was empty except for a cart of milk that turned out to be expired and an almost empty jar of jam.

Maura took out the jar deciding to make toast , she huffed when she saw two slices of toast left, taking one and keeping the last one just in case she didn't go shopping today . Anything to keep her from passing out in school is good. Maura opened the envelope that Alex had left last night and took a few dollars for school before closing the envelope again. Maura double checked the books in her back pack before leaving her apartment and locking the door behind her.

Maura couldn't wait for the break at school; it's the first time in her life that she actually wanted the break to come so fast. Usually she would pray that class won't be over soon, the break was a reminder that she was alone. That no one wanted to be on the same table with her even to eat, but today she wasn't going to the break room. She was going to the school library; she was waiting all night last night and ignored all the comment that she heard all so she could go to the library. She wanted to understand what Jane was talking about yesterday, what made her as excited as she talked about baseball.

Maura wasn't a ball fan but if it would mean having something to talk about with Jane then she was all for it. The library was quit; she helped herself to a few books and sat down going through each one of them trying to memorize all what she read with a smile as she remembered Jane. Then it hit her, it's the second day. Jane probably knows who Maura is by now, _what if she doesn't want to talk to me anymore? What if she become just like the other kids?_

With hope gone from her eyes, Maura closed the book in her hands gently, why did it have to be this way? Maura sighed before getting up and returning all the books to the shelves and leaving the library. How did this slip her mind, no one ever talked to her after their first day in the play ground? Maura shoved her hands in her pockets as she walked around in school; she imaged what her life would be like if she wasn't a Doyle. How different thing would be if she didn't have to carry this name.

Maura wasn't paying much attention in class; all she thought about is what will happen at the playground today. "Maura could you solve this equation please?" her teacher`s voice brought her back to reality. Maura got up from her seat slowly and walked up to the board, she could hear the other student whispering

'look who`s getting up, its Doyle'

'she`s a bit off today don't you think?'

'she`s always off, she`s a freak'

'Yeah, just like her father, dad says that he killed a lot of people'

'Yeah, I heard dad say something about an ice pick, I think that's how he did it'

Maura got carried away as she listened to what they were saying about her that she didn't hear her teacher when he said 'good, go back to your seat' she kept writing and writing, you know that this equation can go on and on

"Maura that's enough!" you flinch when he shouts and stop what you're doing "that's enough thank you go back to your seat" he says quietly again as he approach you and take the white chalkboard from your small hand and gently push your back with his hand. You give a weak smile and return to your seat as the other kids laugh at you.

'What a freak' you hear them saying, the teacher wipes away half of what you wrote

"Ok, so you don't need to know what Maura has just written. You`ll learn it after a few years, now I want you to …." you try to focus on the teacher`s voice instead of theirs. It's painful but you`re not going to let them break you.

You saw how most kids start whispering when you walked into the playground with a smirk written on their face. They're probably taking about what happened today at class, you think but your assumption is confirmed when you hear a whisper

'Did you hear what she did in class? Too bad I wasn't there to see' you sigh and take your usually spot on the swing. Jane isn't here yet, the kids are playing hide and seek which you find completely ridicules. They're in a play ground where are they planning on hiding.

You shaking your head with amusement when your eyes fall on Jane entering the playground, she sees you and start waiving your way with a wide grin, a smile spread across your face when you see her and for a split of a second you think that she didn't care who you`re father is but then you see the way a kid take`s her by the arm and pull her in a corner where you see more kids standing. they look as if they`re telling her a secret and her grin is gone, when she raise her head again to glance at you with confused eyes and you know what they're telling her .

Your hands tighten around the swing and you start to study your shoes. What made you think that she was different from all the others? She won't talk to you again, you saw it coming but it still hurt. you`ll never be anything more to those kids than a Doyle, a reminder of what your father did to their families and loved ones . "Hey" the deep voice drag you out of your thoughts and your head snap up to see Jane standing in front of you with the same grin she had earlier

"h-hey?" your brain is still not registering what's happening, and Jane walk up to the swing next to you

" what is up with you and that swing?" she says in a joking tone but you don't get it so she start to explain " you were on this swing yesterday too right?" you don't answer, you can't answer because your still looking at her in shock " what? Is there something on my face?" you blink twice but you still can't find your voice "hellooo, earth to Maura. Is anyone there?"

"What? Uhhh, huh? I- you" Maura stumbled over her own words in shock and Jane raised an eyebrow

"You me? Are you ok?" Jane chuckled

"Huh? Yeah, I mean yes I'm ok. I`m just... surprised" Maura let out a nerves laugh "didn't the other kids tell you?" Maura was scared of what Jane's answer would be

"Tell me?" Maura nodded "ohh you mean you being Doyle's daughter thing?" Maura nodded again and Jane mimicked her "so?"

"Soo, how come you`re still talking to me" Maura said with confused eyes and Jane shrugged

"I didn't see what does it have to do with me being friends with you" Jane said quietly, Maura's eyes when wide, not because of Jane's answer but because Jane actually called her a 'friend' "you`re going to just sit there?"

"Huh?"

"Maura you're on a swing, it supposed to be fun?" Jane said as if it was so obvious "bet you can't reach as high as I do" Jane said with a daring tone before starting to swing

"Hey! You can't go first" Maura said before swinging as well "and beside, I'm lighter. Scientifically the swing can take me to altitudes greater than yours. That's Physics one o one" Maura said with a proud tone

"Keep talking" Jane replied as she pushed harder on the swing making it go even higher. Maura felt a smile spread across her face as they both tried to go higher than the other. after a while they were both exhausted but still none of them stopped swinging " ok ,ok I'm going to show you something now" Jane said excited before jumping off the swing when it was at its highest and landing on her feet . Jane span around with a wide grin "tadaa" Maura watched her with wide open

"Do you have any idea how dangerous that was?"

"And your starting to sound like my mother, come on your turn" Jane started motioning Maura to jump

"you can't be serious" Maura started looking at the distant she reached with her swinging

" come on, it will be ok trust me" Maura creased her eyebrow for a second, she trust Jane but all that she read told her how she could easily end up in a hospital . Maura jumbled landing on all four "you ok?" Jane said giggling

" that was amazing!" Maura took a deep breath with a goofy smile as she stood up, Maura was having trouble finding a word to describe it when Jane took her hand and started dragging her

"Yeah, yeah. Come on I don't want to get yelled at again for going home late" Maura was smiling like an idiot when they both started running. She never felt this way; she never felt this happiness before in her life. It seemed as thought Jane was introducing her to lots of things she was unaware of their existent.


	3. Chapter 3

"I win!" Jane makes a small jump as she finally reaches her house and Maura fallowed behind her shortly. They`re both out of breath and lean forward placing their hands on their knees with exhaustion. After a couple of seconds they both raise their head and burst into laughter as each one saw how tired the other is.

"Janiee" Maura froze when the front door swung open and a small boy start running, the small boy collides into Jane with a smile

" Frankie get back here!" a voice called from inside the house and soon a young woman came to view, the woman sighed when she saw Frankie clinging to his sister " I swear you kids will give me gray hair" Jane rolled her eyes at her mother

"Hi ma" Jane said with a smile, Maura took a step closer to Jane. Adults were always giving her disgusted glares whenever they saw her. Maura was scared, the time she spends with Jane made her forget about all of this but now, standing her in front of Jane's mom it all came back.

" you must be Maura" Maura almost jumped out of her skin when she heard her name . she swallowed hard and nodded not trusting her voice "Jane wouldn't stop talking about her new friend but she forgot to tell me something" as the woman took a few steps closer to Maura, Maura squeezed her eyes shut _here it comes_ she thought. Jane will probably get yelled at for playing with me, Maura was waiting for Jane's mom to shout at her but instead she felt two hands pulling at her cheeks " she didn't tell me how adorable you are" Maura opened her eyes to see Angela face in front of her " you`re so cute I can eat you up"

"Ma stop, your embarrassing me"Jane aid between greeting teeth , Angela let go of Maura cheeks after they had turned pink

"That's not embarrassing you. This is embarrassing you" Angela held Jane in a tight embrace as Jane tried to squirm out of it

" ok , ok I get it" Jane whined and Angela let out a laugh placing a kiss on her daughters head before letting go , Frankie was laughing at his sister . "Ma can Maura stay for dinner?" Jane raised her head to look at her mother with a puppy face

"I don't know honey, it's getting dark I'm sure her parents will get worried if she didn't go home" Angela looked at Maura waiting for a reply; Maura was still lost in her world. Seeing Angela hugging Jane made her think of the things she lounged for the most.

"Huh? I should probably go it's getting late. Nice to meet you MRS. Rizzoli, goodbye Jane"

"See you Maura" Jane shouted after her before going inside

Why did Jane squirm out of her mothers embrace like that? You would give anything to be hugged like that; you would give your whole life to have someone kiss you on the top of your head like that. You don't understand why you`re running, what? Did you miss your empty apartment so much? You finally slowdown and start walking as slow as possible. You don't want to go home, you want to be there having dinner with Jane. You start to wonder why you said no, but how you can explain that no one would care, no one would notice if you didn't go home early or at all for that matter.

You should be flying with happiness from your day with Jane but with each step bringing you closer to your prison to your loneliness, you slowly start to remember all the things that you blocked out when you were with Jane ,Your new friend . A small smile finds its way into your lips with that thought, your new friend! The smile grows bigger and bigger as you remember the day you had with her.

Before you know it you`re standing at your door turning the key in the lock. You turn on every light there is in the apartment, you know its empty but you still breathe out a disappointment "I'm home" you say into the emptiness. You remember the noise at Jane's house and sadness wash over you

Going into the kitchen you remember something "shoot" you forgot to go shopping today, _oh well_ you think before closing the fridge door. You can see the single slice and you`re debating whether to eat it now or keep it for tomorrow. You`re stomach growls make the decision for you and you grab the slice with a lazy hand. Tomorrow, tomorrow for sure you`re going to the market.

"_That's not embarrassing you. This is embarrassing you" _ her voice echoes in your head as you hug your pillow to sleep

Your day start as usual but with a smile, you can`t wait to see Jane again today. You walk with a smile to school until you see two kids leaving for school as well

' bye mom'

'hey wait up, you forgot your lunch bags' you watch as their mother comes to the door handing them two small lunch bags with a smile

' what is it?' they ask with excitement

' your favorite'

' really? Thanks mom you`re the best' you watch as she sends them kisses in the air and they waive her goodbye . you`re Jealous, you`re so Jealous of them right now but you force yourself to keep on walking, reminding yourself that you`ll see Jane today .

you walk up to your locker where you find the word 'Doyle' written in black marker. How can your own name be such an insult? You glance sideways to see some kids muffling laughter, sighing you start to enter your combination.

It's stuck, you keep pulling and pulling not noticing the boy that was walking behind you. You pull a final time and the locker opens with a thud, the sudden release cause you to stumble backwards and you feel your elbow making contact with something hard.

" aww, my nose" you turn around to see a boy on the ground holding his nose ,you gasp when you realize it's the same boy that made fun of you two days ago in the playground " you did that on purpose!" he shouted

"What? No I'm sorry I didn't see you. I didn't mean..." you kneel down trying to help him but he shoot you a glare

"Don't touch me" he shouted, you raise your head to see all the kids staring at you and whispering to each other

'Did you see that?'

'Oh my gad she broke his nose'

'She did that on purpose'

'That Doyle is scary'

Despite what you said, you still got a trip to the principal's office "did you even try to solve the problem before resorting to violent? All he did was make a comment" the kids already told the him about what happened in the play ground , they all said that you meant to hurt him . You stay quit as he talks with your sight on the ground and your hands in your lap playing with your sleeves. It doesn't matter what you say, no one ever believes you . you`re the daughter of a mobster, breaking a nose was just something expected from you so you remain silent. "Your father is on his way, although I'm forced to wonder how this father is raising you" Maura cling her jaw with anger boiling inside

"he`s not my dad" Maura said between greeted teeth but it was barely audible. Alex inter the room the room and the principal give you a few moments with him

"What happened Maura? what's this I hear about you breaking some kid`s nose huh?" he`s not shouting, he`s not yelling. he`s talking to you gently but you still can't get over what the principle said

" Alex you`re not my dad! you're not!" Maura shouts at him without raising her sight from the ground, her hands forming tight fists on her thighs. Alex sighs and stays silent until the principle comes back again and asks you to wait in outside.

You got a week in detention after school, Alex leaves after his talk with the principle without even looking back at you. you don't care, all you're thinking about is that you won't be able to see Jane for a week. At detention, you buried yourself in a book. It feels good; to forget the reality to lose yourself in a book and before you know it the detention is over. You pick up your back pack and start to walk slowly out of school. You pass the playground to find the kids playing but no Jane; you return your sight to your shoes and keep walking.

"Mauraaa" you hear her voice and turn around to see Jane running to you "I Looked everywhere for you, where did you go?" you`re about to answer when she talks again "never mind, listen we`re going see a movie wanna come?" Jane is still short breathed but has the widest grin

"I – uh I don't ..." Maura tried explaining why she couldn't go

"Oh come on Maura It will be fun, promise. And- and we won't take long" Jane said and waited patiently for Maura's reply

"I don't think your mother will be comfortable with me going with you" Maura said politely and let out a nerves chuckle and Jane started to laugh, they both jumped when they heard a cars horn Jane turned to see her mother`s car stopping next to them

"Oh good you found her. Come on you two hop in, the movie start in fifteen minutes" Jane turned to look at Maura with meaningful grin that Maura understood as _see?_

"I really can`t, I have to buy something from the supermarket" Maura said with a weak smile

"I`ll take you to the supermarket after the movie and you can call your parents and tell them where you are later come on"

"Come on" little Frankie said as he popped his head out of the window

" yeah Maura come on" Jane opened the door and got in the back seat taking Frankie in her lap, Maura looked at Jane for a few seconds weighing her options before fallowing her into the car and closing the door . "So how come you`re just getting back from school?" Jane said in a causal tone

"Huh?" Maura was taken off guard with the question, how Jane knew that she was just getting back from school

"You still have your backpack Maura" Jane pointed at the bag that Maura had in her lab now

"Oh, I-uh was in detention" Maura said embarrassed, Jane gave Maura a nod waiting for her to continue

"I… my locker was stuck and I sort of broke a boy`s nose trying to open it" Maura admitted with guilt, Jane muffled a laughter. Maura saw Angela looking at her from rearview and lowered her head with shame

"They shouldn't have put you in detention if it was an accident. it`s not your fault that the school`s too cheap to buy new lockers" Angela said seriously. Maura raised her head sharply, it felt strange. She believed what you said without questioning any word and even went as far as defending you.


	4. Chapter 4

Jane didn't stop talking about the new movie the whole way to the cinema, something about how Jane was talking with excitement and enthusiasm made Maura completely forget about what happened at school and smile to everything Jane said. Angela was carrying little Frankie in her arms as they walked from the parking lot shaking her head with amusement at her daughter. Jane couldn't stop moving while they waited for her mother to buy their tickets and Maura couldn't stop smiling and trying hard not to laugh.

As the movie began and they took their seats, Maura was so excited. She had seen some movies before at her apartment but never came here to see them, the extremely large screen made her think of how small her TV really was. The plastered smile that was on Maura's face faded when she heard some whispers behind them

'Hey look, isn't that...'

'Doyle, what the hell is she doing here?'

'Maybe she didn't get the memo'

"Hey Doyle" one of them shouted but Maura didn't turn_, ignore them, just ignore them. Don't let them get to you_ "the horror movies don't start tell midnight" he continued and you can hear them chuckling behind you.

Jane turned in her seat throwing a hand full of peanuts on them as hard as she can, satisfied with the resulting silent a smirk plays on her lips and turn back again mumbling "that will show 'em". Jane felt Maura's stund gaze on her and turned her head slowly to her with an innocent look extending her arm " peanuts?" Maura blink twice before she could answer

"I - thanks" Maura's brain was still trying to process what Jane just did. She took a couple of peanuts placing them slowly in her mouth, grateful for the noise that muted her stomachs pleas.

During the break Angela gave Maura some change in her hand and guided her to a near phone. "Ok, you know how to use this right?" Maura nodded "call your parents while we get us something to drink and some pop corn ok?" Maura nodded again, Angela took a few steps before turning again to Maura " don't move until I come and get you , I don't want you to get lost in the crowd " Angela offered a smile and Maura felt her heart stopping for a split of a second . This woman cared, the woman actually cared about you getting lost. You never had someone that cared about where you`ll end up in, you watch as she and Jane holding Frankie's hand disappear into the crowd.

You turn to face the phone in front of you, who could you call? There is no one to call, sure you had Alex's number but it was for emergencies only. you sigh and start studying your shoes when you feel someone`s gaze on you, looking up you see Angela looking at you from a distant. She smiles when she sees you looking at her and you quickly act as if you're dialing a number, attempting a weak smile back at her. You hold the phone close to your ear for a few minutes as if talking to someone, the static sound of the phone deafening to your ear.

You return the phone to its place and take a step back from it when a hard body collides into your small figure knocking you off your feet 'freak' you hear him saying as he and his friends walk past you laughing.

Jane was a few feet away walking to Maura when she saw what happened, she deliberately bumped into the boy with force. He turned around beginning to talk when she gave him a glare shutting him up and continued her way to Maura.

" you ok?" Maura was still on the ground, she raised her head to see Jane holding out a hand for her and awkwardly holding two cans of soda in the other, one in her fist and the other between her arm and chest.

"Yeah... yes I'm fine" Maura took Jane's hand and Jane helped her up. Maura pretended to clean her cloths when she was actually just avoiding Jane's gaze. She didn't want Jane to see the anger, the sadness that filled Maura's eyes. Jane smiled and offered one soda to Maura, Maura looked between the soda can and Jane's eyes with questioning eyes "I – uh, I didn't ask for one" Maura said politely with a weak smile

"You don't have to" Jane shrugged "ma bought one for each of us" Jane offered the soda again with a wide grin; Maura's mind went blank for a second before taking the soda from Jane. Angela came with Frankie after a few seconds and they all went back to finish the movie.

Maura wasn't smiling at the movie as much as she was smiling at being with the Rizzoli`s, it felt great, refreshing, to have someone to care about you. Having someone that remembers you even if you weren't with him, you look down at the soda can in your hand and the smile grow bigger and bigger.

The movie ended peacefully and as you all walk out to the car Jane is still exited , jumping around and walking backwards to face you as she talks saying " did you see the last part? Did you see when they did that thing with the.." you're not actually listening to what she`s saying, your just enjoying your time with her, nodding with a wide smile.

"Ok, Maura. I know I told you that I'll take you to the super market when the movie is over but we need to make a stop first." Angela throw behind her from the driver`s seat

"I understand" Maura nodded with a weak smile before looking down and playing with her sleeves in her lap

"Good, because I can't have you going home without eating." Angela said seriously

"wha- n-no that won't be necessary" Maura tried with a polite smile

"You already agreed" Angela chuckled at Maura's nervousness

"But I ..." Maura tried again but Angela cut her off

" no buts, you`re eating and that's that" Angela said seriously , Maura's mouth opened and closed trying to find something to say but nothing came to mind . Jane placed a hand on Maura's shoulder pulling her closer before whispering

"See what I have to live with" Jane said jokingly

"What's that?" Angela's head leaned closer to the back trying to hear better

"Nothing ma" Jane said loudly before turning to Maura with a grin, Maura however did not smile. Jane didn't even know what she has, she doesn't even realize how lucky she is to have a mother like this, how much you wish to have her as your own, what you would give to be in Jane's shoes.

Angela made a stop at MacDonald's and turned around "ok what`s it gonna be?"

"Hot dog!" Jane said happily and Frankie mimicked her as well, Angela nodded before turning to Maura

"What about you Maura? Want a hot dog?" Angela said gently, Maura was still looking at both Jane and Frankie confused when she heard her name and flinched again

"I don't really eat hot dog" Maura said shyly

"How about burgers? You eat burgers right?" Maura hesitated at first before answering

"Y-yes"

"Ok then" Angela smiled at her before turning to order.

Angela extended her hand handing Jane the bag containing the meals before driving again, Jane reached inside the bag taking the French fries out and handing it to Maura , reaching in again she toke another one to share with Frankie . Maura eat slowly while Jane and Frankie started stuffing the fries in their mouth. It's not that you weren't hungry, it's not that it wasn't Delicious you just don't want it end fast. You want to saver every bite, enjoying the taste in your mouth. Your barley eaten half of it when Angela stops the car at the supermarket. "Janie, you stay here with your brother. Come on Maura" Angela said as she stepped out of the car, Maura gave her fries to Jane and fallowed Angela quietly to the supermarket.

Maura and Angela started shopping normally, Maura was still nervous about being alone with jane`s mother, she`s always nervous around adults. Maura bought some instant nodules, new cart of milk and a new jar of jam. She was looking for anything that could be done quickly and easily, Angela was standing a few feet from her looking at the yogurt when they both heard two women talking

'look , its Doyle . Did you hear about what she did?' she said in a disgusted tone

'Yeah, she broke that poor boy`s nose didn't she? What the hell does she think she is?'

The two women passed by them, Maura didn't need to raise her head to see who they were. It doesn't matter anyway; you knew this was going to happen because of what you did. You just have to deal with it. "Maura?" Maura was playing with her feet when Angela's voice brought her back to reality.

" everybody thinks I did it on purpose" Maura mumbled with a sad tone, Maura felt a hand on her shoulder but couldn't bring herself to look at Angela, she doesn't want to cry, crying means your week , pathetic .

"I know you didn't do it on purpose" Angela said softly, Maura raised her head sharply shocked at Angela's respond "I've only known you for a day and even I can tell that you can never mean to hurt anyone" Maura couldn't forced herself to look away from Angela's worm face as Angela tucked a few stray locks behind Maura's ear, Maura's eyes were pleading, crying for help. " tell you what" Angela started with her normal upbeat tone " how about we buy that kid a get well present and you can give it to him tomorrow at school , just to clear things between you two . How does that sound?" Angela tiled her head to the side. Maura inhaled and her hole face lit up and couldn't help the smile the spread across her face "do I take that as a yes?" Maura nodded quickly making Angela chuckle as she give Maura a side hug.

It was a Spontaneous hug from Angela, but she can never know its effect on little Maura, Maura picked the gift herself and showed it to Angela wanting an approval "that's perfect honey" Angela said warmly, Maura could swear that her heat skipped a beat when Angela called her that. Maura paid with the cash she took this morning form the envelope and they both left carrying a grosry bag in hand, Maura couldn't be any happier . There was just something about this family that made Maura wish she was a part of it.

When they reached the car, both Jane and Frankie were sleeping in the back seat. Maura watched as their mother carried them gently, rearranging them so that each was lying on a side and their heads next to each other. Angela pointed to Maura to hand her a small pillow from the front seat and placed it underneath their heads. Maura sat in the passenger seat next to Angela "seat belt" Angela said gently.

Angela made Maura tell her where her apartment was; she said that it's not safe for a kid to be walking alone in the night. Maura unbuckled her seat belt as Angela pulled up to her building, she was about to get out when Angela called her again "Maura you`re a good kid , don't let anyone ever tell you otherwise understood?" a small smile tucked on Maura's lips and nodded as the eyes began to sting a little bit .

Maura got to her apartment not even caring about its emptiness anymore. She was still living the thrill of being with the Rizzoli; Maura quickly arranged the few items in the kitchen before taking a shower. Maura kept looking at the present that was placed on the kitchen`s table, she couldn't wait to give it to the boy tomorrow. Maura couldn't take her eyes off of it and started to bit her lip to help her calm down, she was so anxious to see his face, his respond.

Maura finally lost her patient and grabbed the gift keeping it close to her chest as she left her apartment again. Maura kept running and running with scenarios of how his reaction would be when she gives it to him playing in her head, she knows where he lives. She stood in front of his house door waiting for her heart beat to slow down from running; she took a deep breath filling her lungs with fresh air and composing herself before knocking.

A noise was heard and after a few seconds the boy opened the door slowly, he looked taken back when he saw Maura standing at the door , a little scared too " hello, sorry to bother you . I just wanted to tell you that I'm sorry for what happened to your nose an-and here! I brought you a get well present" Maura said happily, the boys face hardens as he shoots her an angry glare that is too familiar

"I don't want anything from **you**, go home" and just as he slams the door in your face you hear him mumbling 'freak'. Maura stood there for a few minutes, still shocked at what happened. This was not what you expected; this is not the scenario that played in your head. no, he was supposed to take your gift and forgive you, he was suppose to smile and say 'thank you' not slam the door like that .

The gift slide down from her tiny hands slowly before it hits the ground. Maura turns around slowly and start to walk, this is what happens when you forget who you are, and this is what happens when you get your hopes up. It's no use, it's just no use. Why do you keep bothering anyway? Give up; it will be a lot easier if you just gave up

"hey, watch where your stepping kid" Maura looked up to see a drunk man with a bottle in hand and flushed face almost colliding into her but stumbles at the last second away from you . your eyes are empty as you watch him takes another gulps from his bottle "wait a minute, you`re that damn Doyle aren't ya?" he`s so drunk that he barely get the word right, he clutches his jaw and raise his bottle high as if he`s going to throw it at you but then looks at the bottle again "naa, you`re not even worth it" he start his stumbling aging.

That's right Maura. It's not worth it, you`re not worth it. Maura finds her way back home and curls herself to a tight ball on her bed. _Don`t cry Maura, you can't break. You cannot break _sniffing, Maura close her eyes. What's another lonely night right?


	5. Chapter 5

There is no point in getting up, stay in bed. No one is going to miss you at school anyway. You`re still in a tight ball under your blanket. You won`t let them beak you but you just can`t take it today, you know that you won't be able to handle another comment right now. You won't make it if they start laughing at you because of what happened yesterday, you were a fool. You got carried away and this is the result. You`re better off alone, you`re better off in here, a way from people's eyes. No one can reach you here, no one.

After a few hours with nothing to do you decide to get up. You remember that you have an assignment for school, now would be a good time, to just forget everything. To block it all out and focus, you get up lazily and head to the bathroom.

Half way thought the assignment you get bored and start to look around in the kitchen; maybe you should fix yourself something to eat. You get slowly, open the cupboard and pull out a pack of intent nodules. After placing it on the stove you return to your seat on the kitchens table and continue you`re assignment.

Taking a rug, you pick up the pot and empty it in a bowl when you hear the sound of keys at the apartment door. You hear as the keys are inserted into the lock and the door opens slowly. No one has you`re apartment keys, no one expect for Alex and he only comes at the begging of the month. You walk out of the kitchen to see Alex closing the door behind him, he turns around and his eyes are wide when he sees you

"Maura? What are you doing here, your suppose to be at school" he looks surprised, but you still don't get why is he here

"I skipped it today" Maura said quietly and she can hear him cursing under his breath before walking up to you and kneeling to your level placing both hands on your upper arms

"Ok Maura listens to me, this is very important. Did your father send you something lastly? A notebook?" he looks worried, on the edge as talks. Maura hesitated at first but nodded "ok, I need you to get it for me, that notebook it very dangerous. bad people will be here looking for it soon, I need to get out of here understand?" Maura nod again, she`s scared and he can see that, but he needs to get that notebook. Maura was about to go to her bedroom and get it when she heard a gentle knock on the door, she looked at Alex with scared eyes. He motioned her to be quit and stand still and she did, for a few seconds everything went quit and then someone started to kick the door harshly. " Maura go get the notebook" Alex turned to see little Maura glued to her spot " now!" he shouted and she looked at him with pleading eyes before running into the bed room.

Maura started digging into her closet looking in her pants pockets, she know she left it in one of them but which one. She heard the door breaking and someone talking to Alex in the kitchen, she kept looking until she finally found it and run to the kitchen again. A man was standing in front of the door with a smirk playing in his face, turning her head to where Alex was she saw him pulling out a small dagger from his thigh painting. "Alex?" she asked in a small voice, Alex didn't even realize that she was there until he heard her voice

"Maura, hand over the notebook" the man said in a quiet voice and extended his arm with a smirk, Maura looked between him and Alex

"Don't do it Maura, he just want to use it to bring out the mobs again" Alex said in an angry tone

"Maura, Alex is just afraid of you possessing that." the man said in an amused tone, as he motioned at Alex with lazy hands

"w-what?" Maura looked so scared, so confused. What is that man talking about, why would Alex be afraid of me having it

"What the hell are you saying?" Alex shouted before turning to Maura in a gentle tone "don't believe him Maura" the man started giggling

"I'll tell you the truth" he said quietly

"Shut up!" Alex shouted again, the man ignored him and looked at Maura

"When you were born eleven years ago, the police knew that if paddy would give away that notebook. He would only give it to you, another Doyle to carry on the business ..."

"Stop it!" Alex shouted again

"They knew that he won't send it if you were with a family so they left you alone. Didn't you ever wonder why Alex didn't give you his last name instead of having you suffer like this? Why he never stayed with you although he`s supposed to be your adoptive father? They made sure that you were alone, always alone. For their own benefit, your life was a living hell because of them Maura!" he pointed out on Alex. Maura was lost, she felt was in a roller coaster and her heart beating in her throat, she couldn't even swallow

"Stop!" Alex shouted again, his voice started too hoarse

"They wanted a man they could trust, a man they knew will never work for paddy Doyle. Alex here was the perfect thing, know why?" Maura shook her head slowly; her face was blank with no expressions "Alex told you that his parents died right? But did he tell you who did it?" Maura's lips barley moved as she finally understood what he meant

"Doyle" she said with the realization, the man started clapping with amusement

"Very good, you're getting the hang of it" he smiled

"Damn it, damn it damn it" Maura's eyes finally filled with tears and she tried to fight them off, _Maura_ Alex looked at her with soft eyes

"No one will ever recognize you! Even Alex hates you!" the man shouted, Alex griped at his thigh trying to think of what to do

_Alex, Maura grow up without knowing the love of a parent and will be hated for what her father did .so if she`s acting out it's because she wants to be noticed by someone .whatever the form, she wanted someone to recognize the value o her existent. Although she acts tough, Maura is the one who's having a difficult time. _The voice echoed in his head "die Doyle" the man took out a gun and pointed it at Maura, Maura was so scared that she tripped when she tried to run away.

"Maura duck!" Maura did what Alex said and closed her eyed when she heard the laud sound of the gun being fired, she just wanted to disappear, and she just wanted it to be a bad dream. Maura opened her eyes when she felt a drop of warm liquid on her face, Alex was on top of her with both hands on the ground to keep him from falling, he was protecting her.

"w-why?" it didn't make any sense, why was he protecting her? He hates her

"Because you`re the same as me" Alex closed his eyes trying to breathe through the pain "after my parent died, no one ever recognized me…. Being the bad student I was, I screwed up a lot during class….because I wanted to get everyone's attention. I couldn't get anyone's attention when I was a good student so I acted like an idiot" Alex `s was filled with sadness, remorse

"It was tough..." his voice cracked and his eyes filled with tears "right Maura? you were lonely ha?" Alex's tears stared to fall on Maura's face, Maura was stunned her lips were parted but her mind was still numb "it was so hard ha? I`m so sorry Maura. You didn't have to feel that way if I was more aware" Maura's eyes were still wide, she wanted to believe him, she wanted to believe him badly. The man let out a snort

"Don't make me laugh; Alex hated you since you were born! He just want to get that notebook back" Maura clutched her jaw before quickly getting up and running into the bed room and locking it, she knew that they could still get to here and started looking for a way out.

The man started laughing in the kitchen as he walked up to Alex "she`s not the type to change her mind, she`s going to get revenge on everyone who hurted her using that notebook"

"Maura is not like that" Alex said in a weak voice

" whatever, as long as I get that notebook and kill Doyle I'm fine , I'll take care of you later" he began to kick the door until it broke, the room looked empty . Alex used what's left of his energy to get up and collide into the man knocking him to the ground with him.

Little Maura was hiding in the closet holding the notebook close to her chest when she heard the rumble in the room. "I don't get it, what's the use of protecting Doyle? Did you forget that her father was the one to kill your parents?"

"I'm not going to let an idiot like you get that notebook" Maura heard Alex's weak voice reply with venom

"You`re the idiot,everything is possible with that notebook; do you really think that Maura, a Doyle, won't use it?" he said wickedly

"Yeah, you`re right" Maura hugged the notebook even harder, trying to keep from crying. _I knew it, even Alex doesn't see me _"that's if she was a Doyle" Alex's voice brought her back to reality "but Maura is different" Maura could hear the smile in his voice "she`s … she`s a great kid, that's what I see. she`s hardworking, earnest, clumsy and no one ever recognize her. she`s kind… and knows the pain of others. she`s not Doyle, she`s Maura!" Alex said with anger

Hot tears started running down Maura's face and she couldn't do anything about them, they wouldn't stop, "Alex I told you that I'll tae care of you later, I take it back. I'm going to kill you now" Maura flinched when she heard to more gun shots and covered her mouth trying to muffle a sob. She kept crying in the closet until she heard a voice coming from the room

"It's ok Maura. You can come out" it was Alex, it was Alex's voice. Maura opened the closet slowly and saw the man lying dead in pool of his own blood, she froze "it's ok, don't look at him. Look at me" Maura forced her eyes to look for Alex in the room; he was on the ground, leaning his back on a wall with a gun next to his hand. Maura looked at the gun and back at Alex with scared eyes wanting, needing him to say something "come here" Maura ran to him and throwing herself into his arms, she was shaking badly

He pulled her away from him to look into her eyes "listen to me; I need you to go to the police station..."

"What? What are you talking about I can't…" Maura shook her head

"Yes you can, find a man named Korsak and give him the notebook .ok?" Maura nodded before hugging him "forgive me Maura, I ..." Alex exhaled and closed his eyes, Maura looked up to see his closed eyes

"No Alex, wake up." Maura started shaking him with all her strength "you can't leave me. Alex please. I don't want to be alone anymore." angry tears were running down her face "please" little Maura buried her face into his shirt.

* * *

'A girl who didn't even cry'

'it's her father`s funeral, not a tear!'

'Maybe if he hadn't adopted that Doyle, maybe he`d still be with us'

"Shut up, it's not my fault, it's not my fault" little Maura was standing outside the church repeating over and over again. She wasn't trying to convene anyone as much as she was trying to convene herself with that. The Funeral was the hardest thing she ever had to go through, people kept whispering at the church as she sat alone in front of the closed casket, she couldn't let them have the pleasure of seeing her breaking

"That's right" a soft voice said behind her, Maura turned sharply to see Angela standing with a sad smile on her face. The Rizzolis didn't show up till now, Maura didn't see them in the church. Maura forced herself to look away from Angela`s soft face with anger

"It's not my fault, it's not my fault" Maura said again angrily, Angela walked slowly toward Maura and kneeled down in front of her

"I know" Angela said again, Maura greeted her teeth; she couldn't fight the tears anymore. Maura started sniffing and started to wipe at her tears angrily with her sleeves. "Maura, if you`d like. why don't you come live with us for a little while?" Maura stopped whipping at her tears and looked at Angela`s soft eyes , Maura's eyes were full of unshed tears and her lips were quivering "ok?" Angela reached out cupping Maura's face and whipping the tears away with her thumb. Maura nodded, still not finding her voice to answer.

After the ceremony, Angela offered her hand to Maura. Maura looked at it for a few seconds still not sure "its ok" Angela said softly and Maura hesitate but accepted it. Angela had come to the church on foot so they had to walk their way to her house "I left Jane with Frankie back at home, I couldn't bring him along with me and I`m not a big fan of nannies" Maura was looking up at Angela when she heard someone talking

'It's Doyle'

'So, Angela is really taking her in huh?'

" that`s how it looks'

'Now I'm sure she means well but still I feel sorry for her'

'Yeah, what was she thinking letting that damn Doyle near kids?'

' and she`s so young too' Maura let go of Angela's hand and stops walking, Maura gasped when suddenly she was lifted off the ground for a split of a second from her armpit and then placed down in front of Angela who- as Maura gathered- was the one who lifted her in the first place

"From now on Maura, you`ll be breathing the air from a higher place" Angela said with a grin before standing straight and taking her Maura's hand and they both started walking again.


	6. Chapter 6

As both Maura and Angela walked into the house, Maura couldn't help but notice the warmth it carried. Maura's eyes fell on little Frankie sitting in the living room playing with his Cubes , Frankie looked up flashing a grin to both Maura and his mother before concentrating on his game again. Maura wished she could be like him, not a care in the world, still unaware of the darkness that filled this world, to just be a kid for once.

Maura was lost in a world of ifs that she didn't even notice Jane coming from a room in the house, Jane had her famous grin saying 'hi' as walked toward Maura "ok sweetie, you and Jane are going to share the bed until we buy you a new one and I'm sorry but you`ll have to share clothes too. I tried going to your apartment but the police won't let anyone in, I think they said that they were still looking for something? I`m not sure"

Angela noticed how tensed Maura became when she mentioned the apartment and the way that she squeezed her hand tighter at the last part. Maura wasn't looking at the house as much as she was looking at her shoes again "Jane, why don't you show Maura to your room? I`m sure she`s tired"

"Ok" Jane said happily before taking Maura's hand and dragging her to see the room upstairs.

" ok, I just want to tell you that it's not what you think ok?" Jane said in a warning tone when they reached closed door, Maura nodded before Jane turned the handle and opened the door for Maura to go in. Maura was looking confused at the room that was filled with my pretty pony posters and more to Maura's shock everything seemed to be pink. This was not what she pictured Jane's room at all; Jane didn't look like the type of girl who would own a room like this

"It's …. Uhhh" Maura didn't know how to put it in words. Girly?

"Pink!" Jane completed before sighing "ma has this crazy idea that if you`re a girl then everything you own have to be pink" Jane raised her hands and drops them with frustration as she sits on the bed. Maura nodded in understanding but didn't say a word and joined Jane on the bed. "I'm sorry for your loss" Jane said softly after a few second spend in silent.

For some reason Maura let out a snore with a bitter smile and nods unable to say anything to Jane. She wasn't sure if it was a loss, Alex was never there for her and him dying only means that he won't be coming at beginning on the month anymore. Maura wasn't sure that if she would have cared if Alex died in any other way, but the way he died is what got her the most. To hear him say the entire thing that he said, just a few minutes from his death wasn't fair. It wasn't fair at all, knowing what she knows now and not being able to tell a soul about it.

"I have to go help Ma out with the table so rest till I come and get you for dinner ok?" Jane almost whispered to Maura before getting up and leaving the room. you are tired, you`re exhausted but each time you close your eyes you can see Alex face, you can still feel his tears dropping on your face . She sat on the edge of the bed for a few moments just taking in the new room; she stood up walking slowly toward the window.

It was different; it was a lot different than her apartment. You`re amazed by the meal but you still can't get it in your mouth, the smell of the home made dinner was dazzling but you can't bring yourself to eat it. You raise your head from you`re plate to see Jane and her father talking on the other side of the table, they both share the same passion as they talk, moving their hands in all direction with each words . Frankie is still having trouble with his spoon, each time he fills his spoon with Spaghetti and raise it but by the time the spoon reaches his mouth all the Spaghetti has slipped out of it. You focus your sight on Jane with her father again, you can see how they both are and you can't help but think that you and Alex could have had the same thing.

With the thought of Alex a wave of heat reaches your body and with it a sea of fears attacks your mind. Angela said that the police are still looking for something but why? You already gave the notebook to Korsak, what if the people that were in your apartment weren't the police , what if you got it all wrong , what if the bad guy come looking for you here, what if they kill this family because of you . Why is it so hot in here?

Angela noticed Maura's flushed face and her pink cheeks when she turned to talk to her "Maura?" Maura didn't respond, it seemed as if she didn't hear her at all "sweetie?" Angela tried again gently as she placed her hand on Maura's

Dizziness is all she feels, she didn't even feels Angela's soft hand pressed gently against her forehead. she`s not on the table anymore, is she walking? Is leaning on someone? She sees the couch getting closer and closer to her. Everything hurts, even breathing hurts. She can see Angela in front of her now; she can see her lips moving but can make out the words.

Angela helped Maura lie down on the couch, placing a duvet on her before going back to the now quit table. All eyes were on Angela as she sat back in her chair.

"Fever huh?" frank said quietly, he didn't need any confirmation from Angela, both of them were expecting it

"Yeah, I'm surprised she held on till now" Angela shook her head with sadness. Jane's eyes was darting from her mother to her father , why were they talking about it as if it was inevitable for Maura to get sick , Maura was just fine five minutes ago . Angela caught the worried gaze of her daughter "she`s going to be fine honey, don't worry".

Even with her mother reassuring her, Angela noticed the way Jane would look at the couch every few moments. Jane was waiting for Maura to wake up; she was waiting for any movement from her, any sound that may come from the couch. Angela smiled at her daughter`s concern for her friend.

After dinner Jane stayed at the kitchen to help with the dishes, something she never do but Angela knew that it was just an excuse to stay closer to Maura for a little while longer . Her father offered to put Frankie into bed and went upstairs. Jane kept a close look when her mother prepared some cold water with cloths for Maura. Angela ran them gently on Maura's face and nick and noticed Jane's gaze on them

"Go to bed Jane" Angela instructed, Jane took a few steps away from them before turning around one last time

"she`s going to be ok right?" Jane said as she fidgeted with her hands, Angela nodded with a soft smile

"I'll be upstairs in a few seconds, I better see you in bed" Angela said in a threaten tone making a small smile curl into Jane's lips before nodding and walking away.

As promised, Angela was in Jane's room after a few minutes to see Jane lying between the sheets "did you brush your teeth?" Jane nodded "ok then, goodnight sweetie" Angela was about to turn the lights out when she heard Jane calling her

"How did you know that she was going to be sick?" Jane said in a pleading voice, Angela sighed before walking up to Jane and sitting on the bed`s edge

"sometimes when someone is under a lot of stress for so long, his body start to feel that stress and respond, telling the people around it that it was too much to handle" Angela started stroking her daughter`s dark curls lovingly, Jane was listening to her mother patiently "Maura's been through a lot honey, its only normal for her to get sick like this." Angela whispered before leaning in planting a kiss on Jane's forehead "good night honey"

Angela opened the door to Frankie's bedroom quietly and saw both Frankie and his dad sleeping on the bed, frank with and arm under Frankie`s head and the other still holding a bed time story, Angela smiled at this sight and took the story from frank`s hand before placing the sheets on both of them .

With everyone now sleeping, Angela went back to Maura on the couch; Maura's cheeks were still pink and her lips slightly apart trying to get as much air as possible. Angela was tucking a few locks behind Maura's ear when a soft sob escaped Maura's mouth. Maura was still half sleeping and a couple of tears started falling out of her eyes, sliding toward her temples.

The few tears formed a river as Maura's sobs racked her body, Angela raised Maura's upper half off the couch and sat down placing Maura back on her chest. Maura's hand immediately clutched to Angela's shirt as she cried even harder

"Shh, it's ok" Angela whispered "that's right, let it out. All the pain you were carrying for so long" Angela herself had a hard time keeping her tear in check, this was just a little girl, she shouldn't have seen half of the things she saw. It was still too early for her to face this injustice, this cruelty. Angela kept whispering soft words to Maura as she rocked her gently. Maura's whole body was shaking and her tears have socked Angela's shirt a long time ago.

Maura`s sobs finally hiccupped when her body lost all energy, Angela knew that the only reason Maura stopped crying was because she was falling asleep again. Angela kept rocking both of them until Maura's grip loosened on her shirt and her sobs stopped. Angela raised herself from the couch, lowering Maura on it again. Angela was about to stand when Maura's grip on her shirt tightened again, Angela crouched down in front of the couch rubbing Maura's upper arm and placing a kiss on her forehead.

Maura`s face was filled with tear tracks that broke Angela's heart when she look at it. Maura's grip loosened again and Angela held Maura's fist, placing it gently on the couch.

The next day Maura woke up to a small hand on her forehead, Maura opened her eyes slowly to find little Frankie pretending to see if she`s still ill "sleepy head" he said with a grin when he saw her awake.

" Frankie, didn't ma tell you to leave Maura sleeping?" she heard a voice calling from the stairs, Maura pushed herself to a seating potion still trying to remember what happened last night . Maura looked at Frankie that flashed another smile with a chuckle before running toward the stairs. Maura's eyes fallowed Frankie as he reached another person, looking up to see Jane standing with a concern face "did he wake you?" Jane asked in an apologetic tone. Maura shook her head when Angela in the room

"You`re up! How are you feeling?" Angela placed a hand on Maura's forehead causing blood to pump into Maura's cheeks with shyness "good, the fever`s down. Do you think you can eat something?" Angela said warmly

"Uh, I'm not hungry" Maura said politely, Angela nodded before going to the kitchen. Maura was at lost, she just said that she want hungry and Jane's mother went to fix her something anyway. Jane sat down next to Maura with a muffed chuckle

"Did you really think that that would stop ma?" Jane said giggling " wait tell you see, she`s going to fix you her famous leek soup" Jane placed a hand on Maura's knee and pulled a serious face sighing " good luck" Maura was still confused ,Jane made a move as if Vomiting and Maura's mouth hung open . Jane nodded in confirmation "come on, you still have time to brush your teeth and shower before it's done" Jane got up and held a hand to Maura

"But... I didn't… bring any cloths with me" Maura said shyly, Jane rolled her eyes before grabbing Maura's hand s

"Ma already said that we`ll be sharing cloths for a few days now get up!" Jane dragged Maura out of the couch and led her to the bathroom. " ok, there is a new tooth brush for you next to the sink , trust me you`ll be needing it a lot after that soup and I'll go grab you some cloths" Maura didn't have time to respond when Jane left her alone .

Maura felt a lot better after the shower, Jane had brought her a T-shirt and jeans that Maura had to folds in the end so she wouldn't trip on them. When she got back to the living room, both Jane and Frankie had a bowl of corn flex in front of them and Angela was purring a soup into another bowl.

Both Jane and Frankie started to eat fast when they noticed the soup and ran out of the kitchen the second their mom placed the bowl on the table. Maura swallowed hard when Angela sat on a chair waiting for her to taste the soup "those kids don't know what's good for them" Angela said as she eyed the two emptied bowls. Maura took the spoon slowly placing a small amount of sup in it before bringing it to her mouth to cool it.

Maura closed her eyes when she placed the spoon in her mouth waiting for the test to settle in , Maura's eyes shot open in shock " what do you think?" Angela said with a smile

"This is amazing" Maura exclaimed before filling another spoon.

"Really?" Angela wasn't expecting this reaction

"Yeah, yes I don't know why she thinks its revolting in any way" Maura said without sensing what she said

"Did Jane say that?" Angela asked. Maura froze thinking how to respond to Angela

"Humm?" Maura decided to play dumb and placed another spoon in her mouth

"Jane. Did she say that?" Angela tried again with a smile

"Say what?" Maura tilled her head

"That the soup was revolti-"Angela saw the way Maura was looking at her confused "never mind". Angela wasn't even sure if Jane even knew that word, she smiled at Maura before getting up to wash the empty bowls.


	7. Chapter 7

Maura was staring at the empty bowl in front of her, this was the first meal she ate in this house, Jane's mom made it just for her. A small smile curled into the corner of her mouth with that thought, maybe something good can come out of this. Angela was still sitting next to her, making sure she`ll eat it. Maura hadn't eaten anything since yesterday and she wasn't even sure if she ate anything yesterday before the funeral. Angela knew that she`d be starving by now, she offered a refill but Maura declined politely.

Angela got up from her chair, planting a kiss on Maura's temple before collecting the empty dishes off the table. Maura could feel the heat rushing to her cheeks when Angela's lips met her temple , a small gesture of affection like this was all she needed for her face to turn full on red . She wasn't used to this, to have someone so loving and caring in her life. It felt great, to have someone by your side for a change.

"Why don't you go find Jane, ha Maura?" Angela said softly as she placed the bowls into the sink. Maura was still standing there frozen in time when Angela's voice brought her back. Maura smiled a warm hearted smile before nodding and heading upstairs. Angela couldn't help but smile as she watched Maura disappear into the house. Maura was getting better, Angela didn't know why but it felt like when Jane was bouncing out of an illness.

What Angela was feeling for little Maura wasn't pity, she just couldn't help but fell in love with this little girl, with her rose colored cheek and her cute button nose. Angela started imaging what it might be like, to have Maura with them, not just for a little while but for the long hall. Janie would have herself a sister that might be able to teach her some manners and Frankie would have a sister that doesn't fight over his games, Angela was smiling with the idea already.

Maura went upstairs looking for Jane and Frankie, staring at the closed doors, Maura remembered which one was Jane's room and head for it. The room was empty; Maura closed the door and stepped into the hall again, listening to the sounds. Maura heard the sound of two objects being slammed into each other and opened a room to find Frankie sitting on the floor with two cars in hand, acting as if the two cars were having an accident.

Frankie raised his head to see who came into the room and grinned when he saw Maura "sleepy head" he said with his grin growing wider and wider with amusement. Maura let out a giggle at the nickname Frankie gave her, Frankie turned his head again to the cars slamming them again and making sound with his mouth. Maura sat down next to him

"Frankie, do you know where Jane is?" Maura said quietly, Frankie looked up at Maura studying her as if thinking whether to tell her or not.

"she`s outside" he said before continuing his game, Maura was confused. She was sure that both Jane and Frankie ran up stairs.

"Did she go out to meet her friends?" Maura inquired, Frankie looked at Maura before bursting into laughter

"No, not **outside**. Outside dummy" Frankie pointed toward the open window with his. Maura nodded before standing up and walking up to the window, Maura poked her head out to see Jane standing on her toes and looking at something on top of the Brick roof.

"Jane?" Maura said curiously, Jane immediately lowered herself and faced Maura placing a finger to her lips. Jane looked back at something before turning back and walking to Maura.

"Come on I want you to see something, but don't tell ma" Jane whispered, Maura starting looking at the height of the house, not sure if she could do it

"We could fall" Maura whispered back, Jane rolled her eyes

"We`re not going to fall, come on" Jane extended a hand, helping Maura out of the window and onto the roof

"We could slip and break our nick easily from here" Maura whispered. After balancing herself on the roof, Maura fallowed Jane to the chimney; they both stood on their twos with their hands on the chimney trying to get a better look. Maura couldn't help but to take a sharp intake when she saw a small bird`s nest on the chimney, in the nest lay two small chicks. "They're so small" Maura whispered

"I know right?" a proud grin crossed Jane's face as she nodded. Jane and Maura kept staring at the small chicks for minutes; they couldn't get enough of them. " ok, we should probably leave before their mother comes" Jane took a step back, Maura kissed her finger before placing it on the small creature and smiled fallowing Jane back next to the window .

Jane didn't go inside as Maura thought, instead she sat down on the brick looking down at the street, Maura sat down next to Jane carefully " so how did it go with the soup?" Jane didn't take her eyes off the road but leaned her head closer to Maura's direction

"It was pretty good actually" Maura answered truthfully, earning a questioning look form Jane

"You liked it?" Jane asked surprised, Maura nodded

"Yes, I don't know why you think it's so bad." Jane was still staring at Maura with disbelieve so Maura continued "Leeks contain antioxidants that enhance blood flow throughout your body, by releasing a natural compound that relaxes blood vessels"

"You lost me at leeks" Maura turned to look at her hands and blushed with a smile. Jane let out a snort "you sound like Google".

"Google doesn't have a sound" Maura creased her forehead

"No, I mean because you know these things. Like Google!" Jane didn't know how to explain any further and Maura nodded slowly, still trying to make sense of what Jane said.

Looking back at the street, a man was just getting out of parked car near the house. He was thin with dark hair; the man was so busy reading form a piece of paper that he didn't notice Maura and Jane on the roof when he walked up to the house.

"Wonder who that is" Jane seemed as if she never saw him before which scared Maura a little. They both went inside so they wouldn't get caught on the roof. Frankie was now playing with a small ball, bouncing it off the wall. the ball made contact with a bubble head almost knocking it off the shelf , Jane ran checking the bobble head before turning to Frankie with angry eyes , Frankie giggled saying 'ops' . "Frankie what did I tell you about this?" Jane pointed to the bubble head

"No touching, Jane's rules" he said as if reading a book at school. Jane nodded, Maura was confused. Why was a bubbled head so imported to Jane?

"It's Mariano Rivera bubble head ,It's the first one in my collection" Jane said exited

"You have a collection?" Maura raised an eyebrow

"Well, no. not yet but I'm getting there, I'm just starting" Jane shrugged. Maura nodded still not quite sure what was the point of collecting bubble heads.

"Why is here?" this was Frankie's bed room not Jane's

"Ma wouldn't let me keep it in my room, she says that it messes with the theme or something" Jane let out a snort before putting the bobble head back on the shelf. They both heard Angela shouting downstairs and decided to go find out why

Maura sat down on stairs with her arms resting on her knees fallowed by Jane, the only thing separating them from Angela was the wall.

"Mrs. Rizzoli please understand, this is for the child`s well benefit" a man said quietly

"Well benefit my ass" Angela mumbled. "You don't even know that's her name!" Angela raised her voice.

"She needs to go to a safe house it's the only way we..." Angela cut him off

"No, what she needs is a family, someone who loves her. She`s just little girl for gad sake" Angela was angry

"We can prove protection for her. There is no telling what might happen once we turn the notebook into evidence" the man was trying to reason with Angela

"She could have been killed! Not a week ago, what kind of protection is that!" Angela barked back.

"What happened was unfortunate, but thanks to it we were able to locate what the police was looking for more than eleven years ago"

"Unfortunate?! It was a disaster, a tragedy. Do you what kind of impact it had on her! Her barley said two words yesterday; she spent last night crying her eyes out! I can't let you do that to her. not now, she`s finally being herself again. I won't let you do this to her" Angela's voice cracked. The man sighed

"Mrs. Rizzoli. I was trying to be nice but the fact is you **can`t** do anything about this. This child is not yours you can't make decisions for her. she`s going to a safe house and that's that!" Angela throws her hands with frustration, trying to think of what to do. he can't take Maura, she`s not going to let the little girl suffer anymore, she can't abandon her now. Angela was rubbing her forehead when she caught a glance of little Maura, trying to hide herself behind the wall.

Angela sniffed wiping her tears, "hi sweetie" angle tried to swallow the lump in her throat and a tempted a smile, but her lips were quivering and failed. Maura walked slowly into the room, Angela could see the fear in Maura's eyes. Angela squatting in front of Maura "honey, why don't you go play with Janie upstairs" Angela said softly

"MRS. Rizzoli! I can't let you do this, this child has to come with me" the man barked. Angela ignored him and started tucking Maura's hair behind her ear, tears still running down her face. The man shifted his weight from one leg to another "kid, go grab your things, you`re leaving" Maura looked between him and Angela with scared eyes

"It's ok honey; you don't have to go with him. What do you say you stay with us, with Jane and me and Frankie? You can live here with us" Angela said reassuring Maura

"Mrs. Rizzoli you are way out of line!" the man shouted before turning his attention to Maura "kid do you want them to die? Do you want them to end up like Alex did because of you?" the man said harshly making Maura flinch. Maura shook her head "ok then, now let's go. Do you have any cloths here?" Maura shook her head. the man then walked passed Maura and opened the front door "let`s go" Maura started walking but stopped when she reached the door

Maura turned to Angela, who was still squatting on the ground with shock. Maura ran throwing her arms around her nick and holding on for dear life, Maura closed her eyes enjoying the embrace, she always wondered what it feels like.

"Thank you …. For wanting me" Maura whispered into Angela's nick, taking in Angela's sent. angle`s eyes went wide as they began to water again. Maura pulled away and walked away, Maura turned her head to find the stairs deserted where Jane was. It was for the best any way. She wouldn't know what to say to her, how to say goodbye.

Maura fallowed the man quietly as they walked to the car, with her eyes fixed to the ground Maura got into the car and closed the door

"Seat belt" Angela's voice echoed in her head and she automatically put it on. The man didn't say anything and started the car. Maura was looking at the house on last time when she saw the door swing open and Jane running out of it.

Jane was too late, the car was already moving "mauraaa" Jane shouted as she ran with full speed to reach Maura's window and throw something in before the car sped away. Maura looked at the object in her lap.

"Mariano Rivera bubble head" Maura mumbled with a sad smile as her index gently tabbed the head of the figure. "Trust me kid, you`re better off" the man said after awhile. No she wasn't better off without them, she didn't want to leave, and she wanted to stay. She wanted to be a part of a family; she wanted to watch the baby chick's everyday with Jane till they grow up. She wanted to eat that leek soup for the rest of her life. She didn't want to leave.

**_"As reason clouds my eyes, with splendor fading._**  
**_Illusions of the sunlight._**  
**_And a reflection of a lie, will keep me waiting._**  
**_With love gone, for so long._**

**_And this day's ending._**  
**_Is the proof of time killing, all the faith I know._**  
**_Knowing that faith, is all I hold."_**

Maura didn't even bother to look out of the window, she didn't want to know where they were going, and it doesn't matter anymore. The car kept moving for what felt like forever, none of them talked the whole way. Maura was still staring at the bobble head in her hand, with the head shaking because of the moving car. "We`re here" the man said before getting out of the car, Maura raised her head to see an old house in the middle of nowhere. The man opened her door waiting for her to get out, Maura walked slowly toward the house, holding the bobble head close to her heart. the man knocked the door and waiting for someone to open, Maura was relived in a way that this was not the man she`ll be staying with, if she`s staying with anyone at all. Maura's heart pounded as they heard a movement inside the house, her eyes went wide when the door opened slowly, reveling a man with two cans and a soft smile "Alex?"

A/N :

Please don't kill me :')

lyrics from trading yesterday- shattered


	8. Chapter 8

**sorry for the delay . a spacial thanks to justmets for the beautiful ideas **

It feels like yesterday, being here, watching the kids interact with their parents, walking as slow as possible to avoid the investable. You allow your legs to guide you; they know their way through these all too familiar's streets. Most of the houses haven't changed, faces on the other hand seem a lot different, and perhaps it's due to their lacking the sharp angry glares.

You find yourself in front of the old play ground, all the kids are playing, and no one is left behind. You`re a little relived to know that no one will end up like you and yet you`re still angry for being the only one put in that situation. You decide to move on, you`re not a kid anymore, there is no need for you to be here.

Standing in front of the old building, your stomach clutches and turns when memories flow back into your head. You`ve blocked them out for so long, trying to forget, pretending that they never happened. The owner said that no one would rent it after an 'incident' that accrued a few years back. You already know what the incent is so you don't ask and nod polity.

You should head back know, your luggage must have arrived by know. The maid already cleaned the dust off the house so that won't be a problem. Curls of dark raven hair catches your sight as you walk past a small buddle, too small to call a lake. A figure is sitting in front of the buddle with its back turned to you. _It's not her_ you convenes yourself, what you don't realize is that you have stopped walking and now staring at the figure. She must have sensed that she was being watched because her whole body tensed before she turned slowly to you. her angry glare makes you turn full on red for being caught staring , immediately breaking eye contact and pretending to look at the street as you continue walking . After a few seconds, you stop feeling the angry glare that burned a hole into your head. You turn your head slowly allowing yourself on last glance at girl.

She looks just like her, with longer curls, but it's not. She's not her, she can't be her. The one you know is full of life, smiling at anyone she`d meet not like this girl. After walking a few moments you start to think about that glare, at first you thought that it was just like the old days, but now you know it was different, it wasn't aimed specifically at you; it was aimed at anyone who would dare look her way.

The villa finally came to view, it's nothing like the building you stood in front not an hour ago, and it's surprising how one city could hold two things that couldn't be any more different.

"it`s nice to finally meet you miss isles" the maid said with a smile as you walk into the house. "I'm sorry that you had to wait for us while we cleaned the house. It's a bit dusty, you would have cleaned if you gave us a heads up" the maid said nervously as she fallowed Maura into the house. The maid opened the door to an over large bed room "I'm really sorry miss isles, we couldn't clean the master bed room with such short notice, I'm sure it will done by tomorrow" the maid excused herself leaving Maura alone in the room; her clothes are already arranged in the closet.

Maura lays on the bed facing the ceiling , it was on short notice that she came her , but it was what her mother decides , she said that it was better that Maura took some time away from her . What was ironic is that Maura never spent any time with her mother, the only time she got to see her is when her mother came for a little visit and she only came two times in five years time. _Why did I say that?_

" _my daughter , I'm so proud of you" constant gave Maura a formal two kiss on the cheeks before pulling away and looking at Maura, Maura wasn't making eye contact, she was staring at the ground sadly . She sees the way all parents hug their daughters with such lounging when they see them_

"_In that case, why didn't you ever meet any of your friends?" Maura mumbled to herself but constant caught it _

"_You`re too adorable, I want to keep you all to myself" constant raised her hand wanting to place it on Maura's cheek but Maura toke step back_

"_You`re ashamed of me" Maura whispered with sadness_

"_What?! No, I love you. I would die for you, I love you so much" constant started blurring out stomping on her words _

"_Why is that all you ever say?" Maura asked with bitterness as a lump formed her throat, she`s been holding this question for many years now. Maura took a deep breath before raising her head to look constant in the eyes "You never accepted me; you accepted the thought of having a daughter not me. You were only saying the things you thought a mother is suppose to say" the anger was showing but her tone still quit. _

Constant said that perhaps Maura's outburst was due to her raging teens hormones. A change of environment should help constant thought before taking Maura out of her school and bringing her back to Boston.

Out of all the places constant could have picked, why did it have to be here? Maybe she wanted you to see where you came from, what you were before the isles. It was a punishment as Maura gathered. Maura bit the inside of her cheek to stop the anger that started boiling inside her. She only said what had to be said, it was the truth that's why constant couldn't defend herself in front of Maura.

Still, Maura tried to find the advantages of being back at Boston, it's much more quitter than the dorm, she`s free go and come as she pleases, the library is big, she can spend most of the hours there. The image of the dark haired girl appeared in Maura's mind, ending her chain of thoughts. Maura sighed before finally allowing herself to relax in bed, tomorrow will be a long day.

The chuffer drove Maura to school the next day , Maura got out of the car and stood there for a few seconds taking in the look of the new school , it was nothing much . A typical building with teenagers walking in and out of it with some sitting on the steps chatting with their friends.

Maura was looking around when raven curls caught her attention once more , this time the girl was leaning on the concert wall with her fists shoved into her hoddie`s pockets , the girl`s eyes were a mixture of anger and sorrow till she noticed Maura's gaze and gave the same angry glare when their eyes met .

Maura broke eyes contact and continued her way inside the school. Finding the first class was easy, the teacher introduces her to the class before she took a seat and the teacher started checking the absent

"Mary James?"

"Here"

The names started to fade from Maura's ears, till a special name brought her back to reality, "Jane… absent as usual" the teacher answer himself before writing something in her notebook. Maura couldn't help but turn to the empty chair that lay at the end of class abandoned with a sigh of disappointment.

The class went smoothly; Maura already knew most of what the teacher was saying. She took the small paper from her large notebook; it had the numbers of all her classes. Maura started wondering around the school looking for the next class with no luck, Maura was still staring at the piece of paper tell she bumped into a hard body.

"Oh, I'm sorry I wasn't looking" Maura raised her head with and an apologetic smile but the smile quickly faded when she found the same dark haired girl in front of her with a blank expression. "Sorry, I uh. I'm new here, my name is Maura. I think I'm lost" Maura said and let out a nerves laugh but the other girl`s expression didn't change , Maura cleared her throat before speaking again " I'm looking for Mr. Rosita `s classroom ?" Maura offered the paper to the girl but she made no attempt to take it with her fists resting in her pockets.

"Maura, huh?" out came a raspy mumble, that was so low Maura even thought that she imagined it. The girl started walking past Maura, brushing her shoulder slightly in the process. Maura turned around to look at the girl who walked a few feet and stopped as if waiting for Maura to fallow her. Catching on, Maura quickly fallowed the girl.

Maura tried to make a small chat but the other girl just kept ignoring her so she gave up and settled for being walked to the classroom in silent. The girl stopped after a few moments in front of a door and turned to look at Maura. Maura froze for a few seconds but then understood that this was her classroom. "Oh, uh thank you …" Maura said waiting for the girl to at least give her a name, the girl said nothing. She simply turned and started walking away.

Settling in the already filled class, Maura heard a couple of boys talking behind her

"That her right?" at first Maura thought that the whispering was all about her, but no. she`s not Doyle anymore and that made a small smile curl into her lips

"Yeah, yeah that's her"

"she`s scary man. Did you see the way she looks at people?"

"I know its crazy right? No ever heard her talk after what happened either, but…" the whispering was ended with the teacher slapping the books on the table trying to get as much attention as possible.

As the day ended, Maura pushed the large door with one hand while the other held her books close to her chest. Maura stopped when she opened the car door and turned around to where she first saw the dark haired girl today. Just as Maura thought, the girl was right there leaning on the wall with her fists in her pockets, this time Maura waited for the girl to notice her gaze.

The girl turned to glare at Maura- who to the girl`s surprise- gave a warm smile before making a nod of acknowledgment toward her and getting in the car. The girl was taken off guard but quickly shakes off the surprise and goes back to staring at the ground angry at herself


	9. Chapter 9

The next day was just as normal, except this time when hazel eyes met with brown one`s it lacked the sharp glare it had yesterday and was now replaced with a curiosity of some kind mixed with surprise. Maura smiled and made a small nod before proceeding to the building.

* * *

" how did you do it?" Maura was feeling uncomfortable under the boy`s gaze, he was one of her classmate but they never interacted with each other before and for him to drag his chair to her table while they waited for the teacher to arrive was making Maura nervous. He stayed silent for a few seconds, just staring at Maura before he finally talked quietly.

"Excuse me?" Maura asked politely, this was an unusual way to start a conversation. The boy sighed before talking

"How did you get Jane to walk you to class?" he explained, Maura's heart skipped a beat when she heard the name.

"Jane?" she asked still not fallowing what he was talking about.

"Yes! You know… dark hair, brown eyes, always hanging around the school but never actually coming to class? That Jane. Sooo, how did you do it?" the boy asked again. Images of the girl kept flashing in front of Maura's eyes _her name is Jane too. NO! it`s not her Maura its not her, it's just a coincident. But she looks just like her! _Maura shook her head slightly as if chasing the thoughts away and focusing on the boy

"I …uh, asked politely?" Maura said in uncertain voice, the boy burst into laughter until he noticed Maura's clueless face

"You`re not kidding?" the boy said in shocked tone. Maura shook her head, the boy`s eyes widened for a second. " oh boy" the boy raised his hand scratching his head as if trying to find a nice way to say something when he was interrupted by the teacher coming into class . The boy stood and walked back to his table dragging his chair with him "I'm Barry by the way" he whispered before sitting in his chair

"Maura" she whispered back and he nodded before turning his sight to the teacher.

The lunch break came fast specially that Maura wasn't really paying any attention to any of the teachers. Standing in the lunch line at the cafeteria, all Maura could think about is what Barry was going to say. Maura barley touched her lunch, she grabbed the small carton of milk and left. she kept wondering around the school, she wasn't sure if she was hoping to find 'Jane' or simply because she wanted to be in a quiet place for a few moments.

Reaching a part of school that was almost abandon by students, Maura stood and raised her head to the sky when she caught a glance of dark curls on one of the buildings roof. Without thinking, Maura took a deep breath,walked to the building and taking the stairs to the roof.

"Found you!" Maura exclaimed happily when she finally reached the roof to find the girl lying of the roof`s ground. The girl almost jumbled out of her skin, quickly getting up and looking for the source of the voice.

The girl kept looking at Maura with a shocked expiration, Maura walked around the roof looking at the view

"Wow, I can see why you`re here, now whenever I want to find you I'll just look for the highest building around" Maura said joking with a soft giggle. Jane's expiration didn't change and blinked a few times as if still not really believing what was happening.

Maura turned to try and start a conversation with this girl who seemed so familiar and yet so strange when her eyes fell on something moving next to Jane's legs. A small kitten with her fur a mixer of black white and orange came to view as she kept brushing agents Jane's legs. "ohhh, she`s so cute! Is she yours?" Maura said happily, Maura lowered herself to the little creature`s level. The girl was still frozen when Maura opened her milk carton and drank half of if before gently cutting it from the middle, making it a small bowl for the little kitten. Both Maura and Jane watched as the kitten started drinking the milk.

"Coat color in cats is a _sex-linked trait_, a physical characteristic related to gender." Maura raised her head to look at Jane before continuing "Female animals have two X chromosomes, males have one X chromosome and one Y chromosome .The genetic coding for displaying black or orange color is found on the X chromosome. The coding for white is a completely separate gene."

"Since females have two X chromosomes, they are able to "display" two colors (orange and black, or variations thereof) and white; creating the 3-color calico mix. Since males have only one X chromosome, they can only be orange OR black. It is more complicated than simply having the color genes but that is the basis for coat color in calico cats" Maura said with a smile, talking in science was much easier for her than to make small chats. Jane's eyes widened

" just like Google" a raspy mumble came , Jane was saying to herself more than to Maura but Maura caught it and froze for a second , no one ever said that about her talking except for one person . Jane cleared her throat and turned away as if looking at the view "it's not mine, she just shows up whenever I'm here" Jane huffed as she crossed her arms in protest. Maura giggled softly, Jane looked with the corner of her eye and saw Maura kissing to fingers and placing it on the creature, Jane's breath hitched in her throat. _just like that time_ Jane thought but the bell`s annoying sound brought her back to reality.

Maura stood straight and Jane quickly turned her head away from Maura. "I should be going now, I'll see you later" Maura said causally with a warm smile before walking away, leaving behind a very confused Jane and a happy small kitten drinking the milk.

Everything went smoothly till the end of the day. Maura was heading out, she was already late, and she spent an extra time asking the teacher about an error in the book that she didn't notice that almost everyone that was in school left. Quickly taking out her bag from the locker, Maura started walking fast in the now emptied hall.

Two large hands, grabbed her from behind making her gasp. Maura bit the hand that was placed on her mouth making her assailant dropping her cursing under his breath. Maura could feel her heart beating in her throat, _this can't be happening again_ was all she thought. Breathing seemed impassible as she ran to the door only to be grabbed at the last second before reaching it. Maura kicked and screamed under the large hand that covered most of her face, it was no use.

Maura was thrown into a white van with two men grading her, which was ridicules considering that she had zip ties on her hands and that one man was more than double her size. The men said nothing the whole way, Maura closed her eyes trying to memorize each turn they took, to listen to any voice that might tell her where she was. The van finally came to a stop and the two men left the van, leaving the door wide open for Maura. Maura stayed in the van for a few minutes trying to understand what game they were playing on her. Finally giving up, Maura walked out of the van slowly to find herself in a large space with one man standing a few meters away from her with a soft smile. Anger started boiling inside of her, what the hell he was thinking! Doing this to her, bringing her here?

"It's nice to see you Maura" he said gently, Maura bit her lip

"What do **you **want?" Maura said with disgust and venom in her voice, the man walked toward her but Maura took a step back as if telling him to stop and he did

"I just wanted to see my baby girl" the man said with a sad smile, Maura let out a snort

"You`re baby girl?" she repeated in a mocking tone before bursting into a hysterical laughter with tears running freely down her face. The man took a few more steps closer to Maura; the only thing between them now is less than a few feet

"Alex didn't tell you that I was out did he? I suppose he tried to withhold any information regarding me from you. The less you know the safer you are" the man said quietly as Maura started whipping her tears with the back of her still zip tied hands.

"Doyle" came a mumble for Maura. the man caught it and waited for Maura to speak again when he was taken off guard with Maura smacking he`s face with both fists. "Why did I have to carry that stupid name? Do you have any idea what I've been through because of that?" Maura started shouting from the top of her lungs, a fresh wave of tears running down her face "all the grown-ups looked at me with contempt, I couldn't make any friends! Then I met Jane, Frankie and their mom and I was happy for once but then you had to send me that stupid note book and take it away from me. I hate you do you hear me? I hate you, I wish you were dead!" Maura shouted before placing her hands on her face to wipe the tears with her shoulders shaking with a unspoken sob.

Doyle wasn't surprised at Maura's out burst and placed another kind smile on his face "Maura, how old are you now?" he said gently

"six-teen" Maura said between hiccups. Doyle nodded sadly

"I see, sixteen already. it must have been very hard for you , I suppose after putting my own daughter though so much, I don't have the right to be a parent and apologize from you" Doyle's voice was a mixture of sadness, grief and regret . Maura finally stopped wiping her tears

"Its fine already, just tell me what do you want" Maura said with a pouted face and a small smile found its way to Doyle's face

"I wanted to give you something..." he started

"I don't want anything from you" Maura cut him off. Doyle sighed; he knew that she was going to say this

"It's not from me, it's from your mother" Maura's head shout up to look at Doyle with shocked, pleading eyes. Doyle took out a small object from his pocket "I should have given this to you a long time ago, I'm sorry I kept it from you. I just wanted to hear her voice" Doyle said as he offered Maura a small recorder. Maura`s eyes shifted from Doyle to the recorder and from the recorder back to him before she took the recorder slowly as if it was made of glass and might shatter any moment .

"Take these off" Maura said, still not taking her eyes off the recorder, scared that it would disappear. Doyle took out a small pocket knife and cut the zipped ties off Maura's wrists. "I want to leave" Maura said with a small voice

"I understand, I'll have the boys take you back..." Doyle started

"No, I just want to get out of here" Doyle nodded.

Maura walked out slowly, still holding the recorder gently in her hand, with her eyes fixed on it. It was from her mother! It's the first thing she has of her mother. Should she listen to it now? Should she wait?

After walking for what felt like forever under the cloudy sky, Maura reached the school. She didn't even flinch under the strong thunder. She took a seat on a step in front of the school door. Soon the rain started falling but that didn't change anything. Maura was keeping the recorder close to her heart as if protecting it from everything, her eyes looking but not seeing anything at all.

She stopped feeling the rain drops on her skin, did her skin numbed already? Maura watched as the rain kept dropping around her but not on her

"Ok?" Maura raised her head toward the deep voice to find Jane standing on another step with an umbrella now above Maura. Maura blinked but didn't say anything and turned her head again to look forward. Maura felt Jane taking a step down and setting down awkwardly on the same step as Maura. Jane was keeping a few feet between them with her arm keeping the umbrella more on Maura than on her. Jane's whole body tensed when Maura placed her head on Jane's shoulder as if she had done it a thousand times before. Jane tried to breathe and stay calm, and to relax her body so that Maura wouldn't feel how tense and scared she was.

After staying like this for more than fifteen minutes, Jane slowly turned her head to see Maura's closed eyes. "we should get out of the rain before catching a cold or a feve.." at that second, Maura's head slid off Jane's shoulder and started falling to the ground when Jane quickly let go of the umbrella and grabbed Maura from her clothes , stopping her from hitting the ground at the last second . "Ok, ok" Jane said trying to calm her self. Jane pulled Maura upwards slowly placing an arm around her waist to keep her from falling again. "Uhhh, Maura?"

"Hmmm?" came a weak respond

"Do you think you can get up?" Jane asked in a gentle voice. Maura opened her eyes slightly and nodded weakly. "Ok, come on" Jane was about to get up with Maura when she noticed the small recorder and reached for it, shoving it into her pocket before getting up with Maura.

"That's not my way home" Maura protested as they both started walking, with Maura leaning most of her weight on Jane.

"I know" Jane mumbled between gritted teethes. How the hell was she supposes to know the way to Maura's house? And how the hell was she supposes to know what to do with Maura. _ Ma would know_ Jane thought as she led both of them back to her house.

* * *

"Frankie! Go get ma" Jane instructed once she got into the house with Maura. Frankie kept looking at his sister without moving "now Frankie!" Jane shouted

"Ma isn't here" Frankie shrugged "she said that she was going to buy something from the supermarket" Frankie went back to watching the TV; Jane cursed under her breath before walking toward the stairs.

"Maura we`re going to take the stairs ok?" Maura nodded and Jane started the journey to the second floor. Maura was so out of it that she registered what was happening , Jane placed her gently on her bed and pulled a blanket on her , Maura's face looked so flushed , so ill that Jane could only hope that her mother came home soon . Jane closed the door as quietly as possible to not disturb Maura

"what`s with girl" Jane turned to find Frankie leaning on the wall next to her room

"Jeez, what are you trying to do give me a heart attack?" Jane said in an angry yet lowered voice

"So, what's with the girl? Is she sick or something?" Jane rolled her eyes at her brother

"No Frankie, I drugged her and brought her home with me because I really want to. yeah she`s sick!" Jane shot back. Frankie was not satisfied with his sister`s answer, Jane never brought anyone home with her before , not since what happened at least and bringing her up to her own room? Something must have happened.

Jane ignored her brother`s look and went down stairs. Jane tried to watch the TV but her mind kept drifting to Maura, why did she brought her? Why help her in the first place? Jane turned the TV off and got up bringing her lap top. She typed 'how to treat a cold'

Jane huffed after half an hour and read out loud to no one "if you have a cold eat leek soup" she opened another tap "the best thing for a cold is leak soup". Jane shot up from her chair "damn it! This says leek soup that says leek soup, why would anyone eat that stuff? It's the nastiest food in the world" Jane said walking away angrily toward the fridge and opened it.

Frankie came to the kitchen when he smelled something being cooked; he got in to find Jane stirring a soup with a mask to keep the smell out of her nose. Frankie came and stood next to Jane without saying anything with a sarcastic grin. It didn't take long for Jane to burst out angry, she grabbed Frankie from his collar "what? you got something you wanna say?" Jane shouted

"Ummm, what else are you making for dinner?" Frankie asked in quit voice, not caring for his sister`s out burst

"Nothing! We`ll order out!" Jane shouted again before letting go of Frankie and purring the soup into a bowl and placing it in tray along with a spoon and a napkin. "Hey, I need you to do something for me" Jane said in a small voice

"And what might that be" Frankie said in a mocking tone. Jane ignored his tone and continued, not daring to raise her eyes from tray

"I need you to take this... stuff upstairs to Maura"

"na-auh" Frankie said, trying to keep from laughing on his sister.

"Fine! I`ll do it myself!" Jane said angrily before carrying the tray and walking away angry. Jane stopped in front of a toy that way in her way, kicking it harshly before continuing her way

"Hey Jane? Try not to smash the hole house on your way up!" Frankie called after her before she disappeared into the house.


End file.
